DIARY OF THE DEAD review

George A. Romero's return to the world of zombies he pioneered with the groundbreaking 1968 film NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD is a kind of 're-boot', as it ignores the events of the past films and begins anew in our current times. Re-boot is also apropos as one of the overriding themes of the film is the saturation of media coverage and available technology that allows us all to document and broadcast the events of our everyday lives.


Starting off with a news report at the scene of a double murder (which happened to be shot across the street from where I'm typing this review) the undead first rise up to chomp upon cops and reporters alike. The film makes ample use of news footage, (including actual footage from what I assume was the Katrina aftermath) webcams, CCT feeds, and the like. The film itself that we are watching is supposed to be the edited footage of a documentary called The Death Of Death, which was started when a group of college kids and their sauced up professor were in the woods filming a student horror film when first reports of the living dead hit the airwaves. Director Jason decides that all most be documented, so he spends the majority of the film attached to the camera, despite the distress of his friends or the dangers they come across as they travel by Winnebago towards every one's respective homes.

Romero's films are usually works of social commentary, and this is no exception. In fact, it's so much so that I felt almost battered by it. Whether it was the voice over of the 'documentary' or the peculiar platitudes of the characters, I was left thinking over and over again "OK, I get it! On with the story please!"

And oh, did I mention this line:

"It used to be us vs. us. Now, it's us vs. them. But they are us."

Moving on... I found that the acting looked like acting (it's not suppose to btw) and the dialogue ranged from clunky to just plain silly. The characters were fairly unlikeable and completely incompetent, except that they were all pretty good shots with that handgun one of the character's happened to be carrying that apparently had the biggest clip ever!


Now this is a zombie movie so I should talk about the kills and the gore, which though fairly infrequent were imaginative and even shocking at times, so at least there's that...?

Bottom line, I went in with only moderate expectations, and even though everyone loves Romero, the lovable grandfather of our collective zombie apocalypse, I have to say that this time's he's struck out big time. :(

Strangest unintentional double feature

Today, at separate theatres, I'm watching these two films:



Just thought I'd point that out.

IN BRUGES review

Ray (Colin Farrell) and Ken (Bredan Gleeson) are a couple Irish hitmen hiding in the picturesque town of Bruges (it's in Belgium ya know) until they hear from mob boss Harry, (stunt casting provided by Ralph Fiennes) as it seems their last hit didn't go as planned. Ken is more than happy to sightsee along the canals and medieval buildings, but Ray is wound up way too tight to play tourist in "fucking Bruges!". Soon enough we get assault and battery, drug use, gun play, hookers, double crosses, and a dwarf... but hey, the town is really a fairy tale wonderland!


There's promise here as a black comedy, the writing is clever and appropriately not politically correct, but the overwrought dramatic sequences just don't mesh with the rest of the film. Colin Farrell does a good job as the twitchy and not too bright Ray, and Gleeson is great (as he always is) as the philosophical killer who has no delusions about his actions. Perhaps the real problem is that we've all seen this before, except the scenery is nicer than in a Guy Richie film.

Oh, and there's some great cursing :/

Insert WAY TOO OBVIOUS Woody Allen joke

New York Post says:

February 7, 2008 -- Scarlett Johansson has a steamy lesbian sex scene with Penelope Cruz in Woody Allen's upcoming "Vicky Cristina Barcelona." A source tells us: "It is also extremely erotic. People will be blown away and even shocked. Penelope and Scarlett go at it in a red-tinted photography dark room, and it will leave the audience gasping." The women later have a threesome with Javier Bardem, who plays Cruz's husband.


Like chum in the waters of the blogosphere, this story has given movie bloggers the opportunity to post their favourite pictures of Johansson and Cruz, as well as drool over the idea of two girls kissing each other. What first struck me about this article was that this supposed scene will be both steamy AND also extremely erotic. How could it possibly be both?!?

steam·y : /ˈstimi/ Pronunciation Key - [stee-mee]
–adjective, steam·i·er, steam·i·est.

1. consisting of or resembling steam.
2. full of or abounding in steam; emitting steam.
3. covered with or as if with condensed steam: a steamy bathroom mirror.
4. hot and humid.
5. Informal. passionate or erotic.

Anyways... it's hard for me to be excited about a new Woody Allen project, since the only film of his that I've liked in the last 10 years was MATCH POINT. For the sake of reference, here are pictures of some of the cast.

How to survive THE MIDNIGHT MEAT TRAIN

Cautiously locate your nearest exit



Get off the subway at the next stop.


RUN RUN RUN the fuck outta there!


*Pics swiped from Shock Tlll You Drop

...unless you really need to...

I think this speaks for itself!

Is that meta in your pocket...?

Michel Gondry has gone one step further with a film that features the remaking of other films, by remaking the film's own trailer.

Son of a...!?@$

To Hell with that new RAMBO movie (review to come), check out the SON OF RAMBOW!

My first and final word on so called "torture porn"

CLOVERFIELD review

I'm hesitant to quote a film featuring the number two Scientologist, but CLOVERFIELD had me at hello. Hell, it didn't even have a name back then! On that fateful opening weekend of last summer's "blockbuster" that shall remain nameless, I witnessed the teaser trailer and was hooked. Give me the large scale destruction of a major metropolis, leave me wanting more (what the hell was that?) AND don't distract me with a big star's face... I'm sold!

As told through 'found footage' recorded by a small group experiencing the 'event'. We meet Rob (Michael Stahl-David) at his going away party, along with his brother Jason (Mike Vogel), Jason's girlfriend Lily (Jessica Lucas), Rob's 'main dude' Hud (T.J. Miller), the girl Hud is crushing on, Marlena (Lizzy Caplan), and Rob's best friend/crush Beth (Odette Yustman). Panic and chaos ensues as 'something' very large cuts a swath of destruction through Manhattan, leaving our group of friends running for their lives. Everything that we see is what was camcorded my Hud, (Heads Up Display... cute) which gives us the perspective of a disaster at the ground level. It's not about a group of heroes rising up to battle the creature and save the day, it's about surviving a catastrophe too absolute to even wrap your head around, and that's what makes it compelling.


This film was pretty high on my list of anticipated releases, and the overabundant viral marketing only pulled me in more. The main characters even have MySpace pages for crying out loud! Thankfully none of it spoiled any aspect of the film, it just left me asking more questions as I pondered the origin of the creature, which is entirely inconsequential as far as the movie goes.

So, about the film... is it THE BLAIR WITCH PROJECT meets GODZILLA? Sort of, and not really. Let's get the knee-jerk comparisons out of the way: shaky-cam found footage and a very large monster... check. What it's not is a slow burn of paranoia or a comment on the evils of atomic energy. It's been called a love story with a giant monster (not IN love with a giant monster, mind you) but that's only true in the sense that it's the device that gets us on the ride, and that's what it's all about.


When Rob gets a phone call from Beth, hurt and trapped in her apartment, his friends, and us in the audience, get on this great ride into the heart of the chaos. This is where the film succeeds without question, and what makes it a great theatrical experience. Or a dizzy and queasy experience, depending on your tolerance of shaky-cam. It's the thrill of the chased as they encounter the monster, the military, and navigate through the wreckage of NYC.


There has been some criticism leveled at the film for exploiting the imagery of the terrorist attacks on 9/11, and you can't help but recall it's aftermath while watching scenes of buildings collapsing in Manhattan. I really didn't find it exploitive in a tasteless way, I think it's just a matter of accepting that any film that mirrors those events in any way is going to strike a cord. If it's "too soon" as some will say, then who decides when it's not? And let's face it, all manner of cinematic destruction has rained on Manhattan since we've had the technology to do so. Will we frown on movies in the past that have wrecked up NYC? What about GHOSTBUSTERS! What about ARMAGEDDON? (OK, that's a trick question.)


What I really liked about the film is what a lot of others may complain about. Not enough monster! What/how/why is this happening? I think CLOVERFIELD is a great example of "less is more". It grounds the story in terms that we can relate to, which are survival, and the safety of those we care about.

Next up, Thanksgiving The Movie?

This is all old news, but a lot of the movie blogs are just picking up on it the pic now, and it's a great poster, so what the hell! Back in October, Solace In Cinema showed us this poster for MACHETE, the proposed feature length film that we glimpsed during GRINDHOUSE. Apparently it was included in the official Grindhouse book.


Will this ever see the light of day? Highly questionable considering that the box office for GRINDHOUSE was deemed floppy. Seems that perhaps the 70's aesthetics have at least influenced the marketing of some future films...

“Art never comes from happiness.”

As a full-on member of the cult of author Chuck Palahniuk I'm psyched to see another of his novels adapted to the big screen. CHOKE has been officially described thusly:


Victor Mancini, a medical-school dropout, is an antihero for our deranged times. Needing to pay elder care for his mother, Victor has devised an ingenious scam: he pretends to choke on pieces of food while dining in upscale restaurants. He then allows himself to be “saved” by fellow patrons who, feeling responsible for Victor’s life, go on to send checks to support him. When he’s not pulling this stunt, Victor cruises sexual addiction recovery workshops for action, visits his addled mom, and spends his days working at a colonial theme park.

It's premiering at the Sundance Film Festival this week. Here's a brief interview with screenwriter/director/actor Clark Gregg, talking about the film and why he wanted to make it.

The End Is Nigh

The latest from director Neil Marshall (DOG SOLDIERS and THE DESCENT) looks like Mad Max Escapes From New York. There have been pics and posters out for awhile, but finally we get a trailer for DOOMSDAY. You can find it on the official website here.

Virals are better in Japanese

It's not too difficult to figure out what film this is about. Also available in Russian, French, English, German, Italian, and Spanish!

*UPDATE

Now's there's an manga prequel story!?!

Robots love to rock out!

In case you were unaware, us robots stick together. It's just the way we're built. So courtesy of the always fantastic website Twitch I present the trailer for ROBO ROCK! What do rock and roll, gangsters, robots, and women's underpants have to do with each other? Who cares!

ONE MISSED CALL (2008) review

"Hello Hollywood, I was talking with all the other robots and we want you to stop remaking Asian horror films. Thank you."

ONE MISSED CALL fails to engage on pretty much every level. It's an exercise in mediocrity that cannot even raise my ire at it's awfulness, it just lays there like a starfish in your bed.*

Uber-cute Shannyn Sossamon's friend receives a strange phone message from herself in the future, starts to see weird apparitions, and then dies on the day and time of the message. Then someone else in the dead girl's phone receives a similar message, and so on and so on. Shannyn's investigation into the cell phone curse is soon joined by the one expression of Edward Burns, playing a police detective whose little sister has just died mysteriously.

Where to begin? Obnoxiously pointless visual flourish to start? Check. Bad script? Check. Acting was phoned in? (sorry, couldn't resist) Check. Mediocre and unimaginative ghostly visions? Check? Jump outta your seat scares? Not a chance.

The minor characters, whose sole purpose were to be drearily dispatched, could have been played by cardboard cutouts. The characters leap in logic that a ghost can't call your cell if you take out the battery is mind-boggling. And the bottom line is, it just isn't scary at all!

The original film (Chakushin Ari, 2003) was Takashi Miike's stab at J-horror, and addressed the now familiar societal themes of isolation due to technology, child abuse, and the ability of long black hair to frighten us. The remake barely touches on any of this, and leaves us nothing to think about afterwards (except whether or not someone will pick up the damn phone, which might mean a sequel... groan!) Check out the original on dvd, but do not accept the charges on this latest call.

It's Alive!

Robots love viral marketing! The makers of CLOVERFIELD have come up with a contest attached to this widget that counts the number of times someone grabs the clip from your site. Not that Canadians are eligible, but it is a nice slightly extended clip of what we saw in the trailer.

Bats and Clowns

It's been a long time coming. My fellow geeks/nerds can relate to the pain of watching our beloved comic book characters desecrated on screens both big and small. It seems the odds are against us. Any time someone gets it right, as with X-MEN 1 & 2, we must suffer through CATWOMAN, DAREDEVIL, or GHOST RIDER. For me personally, the ups and downs of my favourite character, The Batman, have been downright heartbreaking.

First the was the shame of the kitchy tv series from 1960's, which even as a child I found to be silly. Tim Burton's BATMAN in 1989 was a step in the right direction at least, but the following films went from bad to WTF?! Thankfully Batman: The Animated Series came out during this timeframe and was far superior in every way to anything Joel Schumacher threw up on the big screen.

And then came Christopher Nolan. I seriously want to hug this man for finally getting it right with BATMAN BEGINS in 2005. Here was the serious and moody origin of the Dark Detective I'd been waiting for all these years.
Next summer we'll see Nolan's follow up, THE DARK KNIGHT, where we'll witness the re-birth of Batman's nemesis The Joker. The hype machine has already been churning out pics and previews and viral marketing galore, such as the latest teaser posters below, and the 12 year old in me is eating it up with a spoon!





UPDATE: The new trailer is now online here.

"making mischief..."

WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE is the first book that stuck with me as a wee child. Now Spike Jones is directing a film version. I seriously have to wonder how they will turn this into a feature length story, but Jones seems like a good choice as director. Check out these first couple pics.






UPDATE: Jonze's ex-beau Karen O has been enlisted to write "songs and other pieces of music for the film".

TDK's viral load

There are now at least a half dozen viral websites for THE DARK KNIGHT, one of which, WhySoSerious.com has revealed the film's first teaser poster.


Check out all the other sites:

www.thegothamtimes.com
www.wearetheanswer.org
www.rememberinggina.org
www.thehahahatimes.com
www.gothamnationalbank.com

It's called CLOVERFIELD damnit!

Well, it finally has a name, which is no real surprise, and now the trailer is online, if you missed it because you were not in the theatres this weekend watching BEOWULF. Also, there's a detailed breakdownof the trailer at EmpireOnline if you're keen.

In an odd bit of cross-viral marketing, if you were watching closely during the last episode of HEROES you would have noticed Elle enjoying a tasty Slusho!


Check out further cross-over madness on director/producer Greg Beeman's blog. Though it's safe to assume that the Heroes will not battle the Cloverfield monster, it does give me the excuse to put up a pic of HRG!

I smell an astronaut!

Notwithstanding the awful Tim Burton remake, who doesn't dig PLANET OF THE APES? Check out these tv commercials from the 70's for the action figures.

What's a writer to do?

So the WGA is on strike, what's to do besides picket? Well, if you're writer/director Edgar Wright you guest host Steve Jones' radio show on Indie 103.1 in Los Angeles, play some tunes and chat up fellow writers Diablo Cody, Sasha Baron Cohen, and Jonah Hill. Click the pic below to listen to the 2 hour show.


Poached from /Film, a great site I visit often for the latest movie news.

The root of the problem

I've been following the news on EDEN LOG, a new French Sci-fi/Horror flick on the fabulous website Twitch, which looks dark and moody and creeptastic. The teaser trailer can be found on YouTube in 10 different languages! Check out the official site here, though only in French so far. There are also pics and teasers in their MySpace page.

Get your 3-D glasses ready!

I think I speak for all robots when I say that we're great fans of Edgar Wright. While reading about the controversy over an American remake of his UK tv show SPACED I stumbled into his 'unofficial but much-needed fansite' and discovered this groovy music video he directed, "Psychosis Safari" by Eighties Matchbox B-Line Disaster.

I'm in love with a witch!

Click above to see other character banners. I'm partial to this one.

Aww Hell Yes!

Bring on the end of the world! I'm a sucker for any story that brings down civilization as we know it. Based on the book by Richard Matheson, I AM LEGEND is the third adaptation of this 1954 novel. In 1964, Vincent Price starred in THE LAST MAN ON EARTH, which Matheson wrote the screenplay for. When the script was radically rewritten Matheson pulled his name from the credits. In 1971, Charlton Heston starred in THE OMEGA MAN, a rougher translation of the source material that removes the more vampiric tendancies of the infected. Now we get Will Smith as the lone survivor who is not really alone. Of what I've seen so far, this latest trailer actually gives me hope.